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Item (ENO2-KE-1) must be stored separately from its paddles (ENO2-KE-2 through ENO2-KE-9). Any person running research, watch, or security within the containment chamber must be tested and have a BAC ≤ 0.08 unless for testing approved by the research board.

The chamber containing the item must always be under a double authentication lock: one by internal security and another on a direct line to research. The entrance to the chamber will always be monitored by camera, and any entry must be added to the logbook.

Otherwise storage is mundane. It may simply rest on the ground of the chamber. Air within the chamber should be between 20-22°C (68-72°F) dry-bulb temperature and 40- to 55-percent RH. 


The item is an antique birch-bark north canoe. It is 7.6m (25ft) long and 1.2m (4 feet) wide and weighs 140kg (308lbs). It can crew between 4-8. The frame of the canoe is constructed of cedar wood, and the joints are sealed by pine resin. There seems to be paint residue on the prow however any markings are too faded to be discerned.

The item appears to be capable of long-distance flight when crewed by 4-8 people, and at least one must have a BAC ≥ 0.08. Control of the canoe while in flight is done by using the paddles (EN02-KE-2 through 9) remarkably like use of the vehicle on water. The faster the paddling the faster the canoe travels, yaw is controlled by the number of people paddling on which side of the canoe. Pitch is controlled by the rearmost passenger using their paddle

It appears the max speed is 12.4km/h (7.75mph), which is consistent with that of a canoe on water. It can carry up to 1.2 metric tons (1.3 US tons), however its max speed significantly reduces as weight increases, especially when adjusting altitude.

Roll is not a factor in navigation, however the canoe can ‘tip’ the same as it would on water. Falling from the canoe results in freefall, with no safety guards in place. Agent Carmichael unfortunately perished this way when  he and the fire-front team drunkenly took the canoe for a “joy ride.” Increased security measures were put in place to prevent future incidents.

Special thanks to:

  • Salvatos for his help with CSS as well as his redacted script.
  • Beefpotato and Tainted for ideas on some NNOs and ENOs.
  • Phil Wang of thispersondoesnotexist.com
  • Obviously Illestis, Karuga, and ArcOnyx of the Kanka team.
  • And you, dear reader :)

NOTE: The portraits of characters are not real people. They are AI generated. Any resemblance to a real person is entirely unintended and coincidental.