Yakko Gwendog

Girl, we romped and tussled wetly all day and all night long
I woke up late that night inspired, to write you a love song
I watched ya sleep and I fell in love
Ya must've been sent from heaven above
Don't think you could never do no wrong

Then you farted...
Oh girl you farted.

First I thought that it was kinda cute
I suppressed a smile when I heard your girly poot
Then the smell came whoftin by
And brought a little teardrop to my eye
I think that I'll go sleep out on the couch

'Cause you farted...

You could make milk curdle
Make your skin crawl
Make the paint peal off of the wall
I won't sleep under the covers no more
Since the hot winds blew from out your back door

Baby, it sure has been a gas
But I can't live life in fear of your ass
So I gathered up my clothes and old dog bill
Moved back to my house at the top of the hill
Well old boy I guess its just you and me

Then he farted...

Oh my God, I feel sick
Drank too much, whiskey dick
Tried so hard with this chick
Still too soft, whiskey dick

Rise it must, point to prove
Wait, I just felt it move
Tried a-gain, have no doubt
Now it's in, fell back out

Pleasure she is not receiving
Bored and angry, now she's leaving
It just lies there, looking guilty
Small and shrivelled, white and wilty

Did your best, gave up quick
Get some rest, whiskey dick

Hand in hand we walk the city
'neath the darkened skies
Stealing kisses in the shadows
Away from prying eyes

Hiding out from those we know
Secrets whispered, voices low
Pulses raising, hearts aflame
A love that dare not speak it's name

Well we just can't let people see
That you're not hot enough for me
Don't tell our families or our friends
Say one word and this thing ends
It's true
Cause I'm prettier than you

I'll take you on a special date
Enjoy your company
If someone we know happens by
Just hide behind that tree

To a late night puppet show
Or a sanitarium we'll go
A midnight picnic in the park
Anywhere that's really dark

Well we just can't let people see
That you're not hot enough for me
But I'll enjoy this right or wrong
'til someone better comes along
My boo
Someone prettier than you

I wish I weren't a shallow man
I wish that I cared not
I wish I weren't so superficial
I wish you were more hot

It should not be a shame to see
I love your personality
What we have is good and true
For you've got me
And lucky you

But we just can't let people see
That you're not hot enough for me
So close your eyes and sing along
At least I wrote you a love song
It too
Is prettier than you

Caught me a rodent in the banks by the lee
If it's good for Sir Gere,
Then it's good for me,
I get undressed, start to lube
I stick the gerbil in the end of the tube

Wondering just how he'll feel
Will he like it better than a little wheel
Careful now he's right beside me
One more inch and he's inside me

Go, gerbil go
Burrow harder, burrow deeper
Be my little chimney sweeper
One thing I forgot about
How am I supposed to get you out?

So now my Gerbils on easy street
It's warm and cozy and there's plenty to eat
The situation is beyond my control
Gotta find a way to get him out of his hole

I try prybars, I try wires
I almost had him with a pair of pliers
I try cheese but he's not biting
I wish this wasn't so exciting

Go, gerbil go
Oh god I'm such a sucker
Please get out you furry fucker
I think I am getting ill
Suddenly he's very very still

Now it's too late
My gerbil died
I guess I have committed gerbicide
Here's some advice
It's very clear cut
If you love your gerbil
Don't stick him up your butt
Don't stick him up your butt
Little furry gerbil in your boyquim
Yeah