Remove ads by subscribing to Kanka or enabling premium features for the campaign.

  1. Journals

Transcript of the official opening of the Queen's Cat Inn, T'Kashire

Transcript

Transcript of a Memory Crystal recording of the opening of the Queen's Cat Inn in the village of T'Kashire, Old Duchy of Balla and Tréigthe, Troll Empire, taken by Aoife Lyniela, secretary to Shayla Maoilriain as Mayor of T'Kashire.

VISUAL CONTEXT: 
A small crowd has gathered around the square as the sign is raised into place at the entrance to the inn. It is still covered in a tarpaulin as to keep the surprise. A ribbon hangs over the door reading the terrible misspelling of "GRANS HOPNIN", which the local children made for the owner. Said owner, a Lesser Catfolk immigrant by the name of Ashraiah el Sabine sits outside to greet the crowd.

Ms. Lyniela: You know, I've never understood how you could sit though all these things.
Mayor Maoilriain: Shut up! You do this for the people you care about.
Ms. Lyniela: I'm here aren't I? (pause) Crap, this wasn't meant to be on yet.
(Sound of Mayor Maoilriain laughing)
Ms. el Sabine: Keni, you're late! Damn it, you said you'd be on time!
Kenina Aoibhainn (barmaid to Ms. el Sabine): Sorry, family emergency. Where's that darn bard?
Ms. el Sabine: (shrugs) Apparently he's not a fan of being seen in public. Right, let's do this then. Shayla? We're ready.
(Mayor Maoilriain flies to the front and floats next to Ms. el Sabine)
Mayor Maoilriain: Ladies and gentlemen, I, Mayor Shayla Maoilriain of T'kashire declare this inn open. 
(She cuts the ribbon. The sign is unveiled with the tarpaulin unintentionally landing on both Mayor Maoilriain and Kenina Aoibhainn. Mixture of shock and laughter from audience.)

VISUAL CONTEXT:
The sign is beautifully detailed, all greens and oranges. In gold, the name THE QUEEN'S CAT stands proudly underneath the painting. The painting consists of a queen with a Catfolk sat at her feet. The queen looks incredibly... familiar. The Catfolk is wearing a leash and the whole painting has a slight but undeniable erotic tone with red drapes behind them. Several mothers in the crowd cover the eyes of their children.

Ms. el Sabine: (audibly nervous) Um, ta-da?
Ephri McHayden (Master Smith and local resident, stood next to Ms. Lyniela, sounding audibly disappointed): Mum, why did you paint this?
Jezebel McHayden (local illustrator and sign painter who made the sign, also mother of the above): I at least thought it was funny.
Unknown heckler in crowd near Ms. el Sabine: You furry pervert!
Ms. el Sabine (directed at heckler): Oh go fuck yourself you prude!
Mayor Maoilraian (directed at Ms. Lyniela, clearly trying not to laugh): Um, Aoife, the queen on the sign looks a lot like...
Ms. Lyniela (noticeably less impressed): ...Yes, I believe that is meant to.
Mayor Maoilraian: And the cat is clearly...
Ms. Lyniela: Why am I not surprised?
(Ms. el Sabine breaks down laughing, as does Mayor Maoilraian as the crowd disperses. Ephri McHayden walks up to Ms. el Sabine)
Ephri McHayden: I hope you're happy, you reprobate.
Ms. el Sabine: Relax, it's a publicity stunt Ephri. Wasn't even my idea, it was Kadar's.
Mayor Maoilraian: He would have found this hilarious. 
Ms. el Sabine: Your mum made two signs. The other is much more publicly appropriate. (pause) So, you guys want a drink?
Ephri McHayden: (sighs) No, thanks. (she leaves.)
Mayor Maoilraian: Yes, I'll take you up on that.

- recording is cut off by Ms. Lyniela -